#3 – Is having fun in church so bad?

#3 – Is having fun in church so bad?

In continuing my series about things we know to be true but we forget about when we teach kids, we come to a topic that is controversial. I have heard it said many times that the church is not a social club. Most of the time, this is referring to the adults and the fact that the churches need to push their congregations harder and challenge them in their walk with the Lord. It has also been used to question the activities of Youth or Children’s Ministries. These particular ministries tend to have activities for the sake of having activities. They like to have fun and people think they are forgetting the purpose of the church: make disciples. While this may be true of some ministries, there is a reason for this type of programming.

I think it would be helpful if we used a different word instead of “fun”. When people use the word “fun” in relation to the church, they normally use it with a negative tone. The Gospel is serious and the issues of Heaven and Hell are as well. We need to focus on these items and “fun” is not appropriate. “Fun” also can become an end in itself. Thus, people say there is no redeeming value in these “fun” activities.

That is why I like to use the word “engaging” instead of “fun”. The word “engaging” is more of an umbrella word that includes fun but also includes teaching and conversations. This word also indicates that the fun is not the end result. In order to be able to speak in people’s lives, one needs to be able to have a connection. These engaging events are ways to make these connections. As an example, we had one child that was having problems in our Awana program. He would not respond to me at all and was being disruptive to the class. Once I got him talking about professional wrestling, he opened up about what was going on and we could work through some struggles he had. Ministry is done through relationships. Thus, our activities need to be engaging to create those relationships.

In addition, all people tend to be more enthused to learn about topics that are more enjoyable to them. Because of this, we tend to have themes that are kids-friendly. We are doing an animal theme now and we have done a series on candy. Both of these are engaging topics for kids and they are able to have hooks in their minds to the teachings we are trying to relay to them. I still have someone that comes up to me to talk about the idea that mints hide bad breath like we try to hide our sin. The way to get rid of bad breath is to brush our teeth and the way to get rid of our sin is to confess it to God. That was taught back in early December.

Engaging topics and engaging activities help the kids connect with the lesson more and help them remember the main point better. Yes, having fun at church is a good thing but there is a purpose for the fun: to engage the kids with the leaders and with the lessons.

#2 - What makes us spiritually smart?

#2. Just knowing a lot of facts doesn’t mean you’re smart.

This is the second in a series of posts discussing some educational ideas that we know are true but we gloss over them when we teach kids, specifically in light of Children’s Ministry in the church. This one hit home to me pretty hard. I grew up in a Christian home and I was the typical know-it-all. Whether at church or at school, I had a knack for trivia. I used any test or quiz as an opportunity to show off. At church, my friend and I were always competing against each other. We could name the 12 disciples, 12 tribes, 10 commandments, Books of the Bible and regurgitate most every Bible Story including the minor details.

Throughout grade school and Junior High (what we called Middle School), I lived in this realm of collecting trivia. When I got to High school, the Bible studies that we did in the youth group changed. They were not about the stories as much as about life lessons. For example, more time was spent in the epistles than the stories in the Gospels. Eventually, it dawned on me that trivia is not the end goal of Christianity. By that time, it was clear that others got that sooner than I and they were much further along in their spiritual walk than I was. I was finding myself being confused by the questions that were asked where they were providing insight with their answers. I had missed a large piece of the puzzle.

Why did I miss it? There are a couple reasons that I think translate to kids today. First, it was easier. Facts and tidbits of information were easy for me to remember. The analytical side of me took over and convinced me that this was most important. It was easy to see if I was right or not; it was objective and that appealed to my logical side. Second, I was good at it. As a junior higher, I was trying to fit in and I found something I was good at. My value came from being the “smartest person” in the room. Boy, did I have my treasure in an empty pursuit there.

The referenced article states that learning too many facts and focusing on the detail too much can actually hurt the student when it comes to using thinking skills. I fully agree. When the High School Bible Studies asked thinking questions, I was too busy trying to find “the correct answer”. Instead, it was enough to just start thinking about the subject.

So what does this mean to our ministries? Similar to the previous post, we need to make sure we are teaching the “why” behind the stories and verses and not just the “what”. We need to tie the lessons to the real life of our audience. One tool I have found very helpful is to ask them what they are struggling with. If we are dealing with temptation, throw it out to them and see what they say. I have been surprised many times with how deep and honest they can be with their answers.

Secondly, we need to be aware of what we value and reward. Bible drills are good and review questions are important. However, are we rewarding those behaviors more than thinking skills and applying the lesson to their lives? Of course we are because the objective is much easier to quantify than the subjective. The problem is that the subjective thinking areas are the ones we need to make sure the kids spend some time processing. I am not opposed to rewards but we need to make sure we are teaching the important lessons.

As in every discipline, just having the knowledge is not enough. In music, knowing theory is good but putting it to work when performing is better. A doctor can know what is wrong with a patient but a good doctor takes the next step and knows how to treat the problem. The same is true in the Christian walk. We need to make sure we are teaching how to use the lessons we learn in the Bible in our day to day lives (James 1:23-25).

Mistake with Commercials

It is a tradition that I started a few years back to rate the Super Bowl Commercials. I did this with my team at Midland National because not everyone was interested in the game itself. We had fun with it. Since I have left Midland, I still pay attention to the commercials. Yesterday, I rated the commercials that I thought were the best on a Facebook post. I was nervous about one of them but included it anyway.

After thinking through the situation, I need to apologize for including the Fiat commercial in my list. I have a long standing rule about crude humor that I abandoned: if you cannot explain the joke/saying to an elementary aged-child without being embarrassed, it is not appropriate. That is why I have edited my previous post. While funny, it was inappropriate in a context where children would be watching.

One of my hobbies is to find out where certain sayings originate. For example, “Three sheets to the wind”, meaning someone is drunk, refers to what a ship needs to do in order to sail against the wind, They need to go back and forth in a zig-zag fashion. This resembles the way a drunk walks. This started because I am a literal person and I deal with children, who are very concrete thinkers themselves and also take a topic and drive it into the ground through repetition. One day, I heard someone use a phrase I had used many times before for someone that was trying to win favor with someone in authority by flattery or service (think a color and the thing you use to smell). It dawned on me, how can I explain this to a child without getting into topics that they should not be talking about?

Some of you may think I am being a prude or too rigid. That is fine; you are entitled to your opinion. In fact, I agree with you. I am being strict. The reason is that our kids grow up too fast as it is. I do not want to be the person that puts those ideas in their heads.

Philippians 4:8 “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”

#1 Bible Memory: Fruitful or Wasteful?

Recently, I read an article about educating children and how we are not doing the best job of it. The article highlighted the work of Alfie Kohn, who wrote down 10 truths we know about educating kids that we ignore when we actually teach kids. As I read these 10 ideas, each one resonated with me in my education but also how I teach the kids at church. In the next few posts, I want to investigate each one and how it relates to church ministry. Here is his first point:

#1. Much of the material students are required to memorize is soon forgotten.

While the first church related thing that comes to mind is AWANA, this is true about memory verses in Sunday School or Children’s Church. In his explanation he says this:

 “Knowledge is less likely to be retained if it has been acquired so that one will perform well on a test, as opposed to learning in the context of pursuing projects and solving problems that are personally meaningful.”

Getting a section “signed off” in Awana or being able to say a verse in front of the Sunday School class can be seen by the child as a test. That is the perceived purpose for memorizing scripture. As he said, this is not the best way to help the child remember. My oldest son was a prime example. He had a great short-term memory. He would not do any work on his Awana book all week. On the way to church, he would start looking at the verses and be able to get 3-4 sections done in a night. The reviews were harder for him because he had forgotten the verses by that time and they had more verses to remember. He made it through Cubbies, Sparks and TnT (Timothy Award) this way. If you ask him now (he is in college) about the verses, he can hardly remember any of them. In the books, Awana tries to tie the verses into the whole section and they try to teach the clubber more about what the verse means. Unfortunately, as Awana Leaders, too often we are too concerned with getting the section signed off so we can move on to the other kids than making sure they fully understand the verses they are saying.

So how can we help this? One, be more intentional in explaining the verses. Two, make the purpose of memory to be understanding and application rather than “performance”. In Awana, one of the Children’s Ministry Director’s I worked under impressed on me the importance of asking a child what the verse means after they say the verse. If they can put it in their own words, they understand what it is saying.

In our Children’s church and in some Sunday School material, they have a memory verse(s) for multiple weeks. I see this as more beneficial in that repetition over the multiple weeks can help reinforce the verse. Also, it gives the teacher more opportunity to explain the verse in different contexts and in different ways. For example, teaching Psalm 119:11 “I have hid your word in my heart that I may not sin against you”: One week we would write the verse on a board, say it, then erase a word, then say the verse and repeat until the verse is gone. Then, I would explain how we can read the Bible and forget what it says. That does not help much; we need to make sure we can remember what God says. That is why we memorize verses. The next week we would have cards with the words printed on them and have the kids put them in order. Then I would explain how having Bible verses in my head helps me when I am being tempted, just like Jesus did in the wilderness.

My point is that rote memory is not the most helpful way to learn. On the other hand, memorizing Scripture is important to the spiritual walk of our kids. Thus, we need to be careful and make sure that just being able to spit back some words that are in the Bible is not the goal of memorizing Scripture. Understanding them and applying them to our lives is the goal. That is why I love Psalm 119:11 and have used it as one of my ministry verses: it does not stop with the first phrase “I have hid your word in my heart”. It goes on to tell us why we should: “So I may not sin against you.” Memorization and application. “They go together like peas and carrots.” (Forest Gump)

Additional recources:

https://strangetriumph.wordpress.com/2012/05/17/the-danger-and-potential-of-memorizing-scripture/

http://childrensministry.com/articles/should-childrens-ministries-require-scripture-memory/

Strange Place to Find Children's Resources

When you think of gathering material for Children’s Ministry, one does not think of looking to John Stott or someone connected to Charles Spurgeon. The picture that comes to mind is one with very deep messages using big words and heavy concepts that are hard for adults to understand not to mention children. Fortunately, I came across two gems when I was searching for resources for our next series on animals.

The first resource is written by John Stott called The Birds Our Teachers. It is a small book and I paid just over 11 dollars for it from Christianbook.com including shipping but it is filled with simple truths that are related to the behavior of birds. Stott was an amateur bird watcher and spent quite a bit of time obeying God’s command in Matt 6:26 “Look at the birds of the air”. He has 11 chapters where he ties either a trait of a specific bird or a general characteristic of birds in general to a biblical truth. Not to give away his thunder, he uses the fact of migration in certain birds and how they return to the same place year after year to our needing to repent and return to Christ after we sin. Simple enough for a child to understand but a profound lesson that anyone can benefit from considering. After reading some of his writing in Seminary, I was pleasantly surprised how accessible this book is and how easily it can be used for our Children’s Church.

The second resource is written by a preacher named Richard Newton (1813-1887). He was born in England but came to America early in his life. He spent most of his time in America in Pennsylvania with attending the University of Pennsylvania and pasturing there as well. He wrote a book called Bible Animals and Lessons Taught by them for Children. It is really a collection of 16 sermons that he preached to children on different animals that are found in the Bible. Again, instead of being too high-brow, he is gentle and speaks the language of children. It is easy to see why the great Charles H Spurgeon called him “The Prince of Preachers to the young”. For example, he teaches about the goodness of God by discussing the way the camel was distinctly made for walking in the desert for long periods of time. I do need to say that some of what he said about the physical makeup of the camel was incorrect and he continued the thought that in talking with the rich young ruler, Jesus used “eye of a needle” to mean a small city gate. While those are important, the greatest thing I received by reading his book is the lessons and insight he had to relate the animals to God’s truths.

One never knows from where great material will come. I hope these resources can help bring God’s big message to the little hearts to which we minister.

Latest Reflections on Col 1:28-29

Colossians 1:28-29

Him we proclaim, warning everyone and teaching everyone with all wisdom, that we may present everyone mature in Christ. For this I toil, struggling with all his energy that he powerfully works within me.

In my daily reading, I came across these verses again. I am not sure when I first noticed these verses but they have become some of my ministry verses. After Paul talks about how he struggles for some of the other churches, he says this:

Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him,  rooted and built up in him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving. (Col 2:6-7)

Today, I read an article talking about 4 teachings of Jesus that Christians ignore (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/brandan-robertson/4-teachings-of-jesus-that_b_6343320.html). It sounded interesting and it was somewhat true. The author and I do not see eye to eye on all of the four points but he does make some interesting comments. For example, he states that people are not saved by believing the right things but by doing the will of God. While I would point to John 3:16, he points to Matthew 7:21: “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. He alludes to the two greatest commandments: Love God and Love your neighbor. Sometimes, we simplify things too much and forget that God is to be our LORD or master and not just someone we believe in (James 2:14-26 and Col 2:6-7).

After reading this article, I decided to read some of the comments. I know that this is dangerous but I did it anyway (http://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/03/opinion/sunday/this-story-stinks.html). There is an interesting back and forth that happens particularly with religious articles on Huffington Post but it occurs many other places as well. You get the “defenders of the faith” (I have been known to do this from time to time). These people see it as their duty to correct the misinterpretations of either the Bible or the Christian faith. Then you get the other side where they feel that anything to do with God is a fairy tale or a lie and cannot be believed let alone base your life upon it. Within each side, there is a wide spectrum of views/arguments as well. Some Christians take the approach that “God says it, I believe it, that settles it!” The comments they make do not help the conversation and more times than not, they cause splintered threads in the comments when others take exception to those “baseless” comments. You get similar ones from the other side like, “Everything in the Bible can be disproven.” First of all, this can never be proven (in fact, it is pretty easy to be disproven) and secondly, this does not help the conversation. To address all of these is like chasing rabbits all over the place. It is exhausting and not very helpful.

On the other hand, there are some on both sides who are ready to engage in a discussion about these topics in a rational, logical, and constructive manner: Christians who know that many do not hold Scripture in as high regard as we do and skeptics who are willing to walk through their objections with the Christian faith. These are the people with whom I want to interact. These are the people that make me question the “what” and the “why” of my beliefs. I am not the best at making logical arguments and having a good back and forth with these people, help me understand better and also how better to communicate what I believe.

Lately, I have been reminded in various ways that there are many people who do not understand the claims of Christ. We as the church need to be “struggling with all his energy that he powerfully works within me” to be “warning everyone and teaching everyone with all wisdom” the wonderful truths of God. Like I told the Awana kids on Wednesday, the purpose for learning the verses is 1) so we can learn about God, 2) so we can act more like Him and 2) so we can tell others about Him. Sometimes, I get caught in 1 or 2 but God calls us to do all three. How are you living out all three?

Jesus is more needed than DOMA

While the news that the Supreme Court has ruled that the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) is unconstitutional is disappointing, I am not surprised nor am I discouraged. If we look at other governments throughout history of the world (and many even today), American Christians are better off than many others. Many have been imprisoned or killed just for having a Bible. We need to stop feeling sorry for ourselves and “bloom where we are planted” both in our location and our point in history. Besides, as the song goes: “This is not our home, we are just passing through.” God did not promise us that our road on earth will be easy. In fact, he said it would be just the opposite. We need to realize that America is not the promised land and it never was.

What the world needs is not DOMA but Jesus. Hebrews 11 lists Old Testament saints that heard the Word of God and acted on it. Abraham, Moses, Gideon, Samson, David, and Samuel: those names help us recall their stories of faith and victory by the hand of God.  At the end of the chapter in verses 36 and 37, the writer of Hebrews lists out many things that happened because people believed in God. After reading that list, ask yourself this question, have I ever endured those types of persecutions? Would you be willing to suffer like that for the sake of the Gospel? I look in the mirror and feel convicted because I feel awkward about telling others about Jesus so I don’t. Some people are killed for telling others about God but still do it. Those people are more aware of what is at stake than we are. If we truly believed that they were going to hell because they do not know about Jesus, we would shout it from the rooftops. But we don’t.

So, I have some more questions for you and me to answer. What does being a Christian mean to you? Does it mean that you are a fairly good person and you “don’t drink or chew or go with guys that do”? Does it mean that you go to church when it is convenient for you? How does being a Christian affect your life? Do you know more and spend more time talking and reading about a sports team than the Bible? We are called to love people that are different from us. We are called to watch what we say about others. Are these qualities present in your life? There are many areas in my life that I need to work on. I urge you to pick one. Pick one area that God has been waiting for you to give to him. That may be pride, how you talk about others behind their back, lack of prayer time or time in the Bible, your temper or your laziness. Whatever it is, God is asking for you to trust that He knows what is best for you. You can give it up and He will help you through it.

What difference does being a Christian make in your life? Today, make sure you show someone what difference it has made in your life and can make in their life.